don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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