Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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