Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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