I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
she pinky promised me she was 18
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
So much rum. So many feels.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
