I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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