Are we in a gay sports bar?
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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