Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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