Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
