woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I will be naked everywhere
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
