it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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