Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
