fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
