Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
