oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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