wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
