my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Randomize
