I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Is it because I queefed?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
