Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
