get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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