So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
