How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
