i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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