why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
