I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
