Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
the night ended with taco bell and tears
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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