You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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