Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
