we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
