I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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