I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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