Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
