Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
