As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize