just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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