Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
