how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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