saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
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