Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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