im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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