So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
