Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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