You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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