Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
