i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
My balls are so social today.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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