I wannas sexs uuuuu
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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