If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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