What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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