we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
