it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
