I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
